Obsessed with Hand Sanitizer

Now, let me start out by saying that I have had some of the hand sanitizers around for years. This didn’t start with the Covid 19 thing with me.

History:

Traveling every day for years in my car across Middle and South Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee and later some in Florida, I found myself coming into contact with many situations that caused one too question the survivability of anyone coming in close contact. When you add traveling with a wife that has walked out of more than one motel, hotel, restaurant and B&B, having a means of self-defense was always necessary. Concealed carry had a different meaning.
Without painting too vivid a picture, let’s just say there have been public restrooms that would gag a buzzard. The State rest areas are great but are not to be found on the backroads and secondary highways. A sign saying Clean Restrooms means different things to different people. So, a bottle of Purell, Germ-X or Publix Sanitizer was always present in our vehicles.

Also, you’d find a roll of paper towels and a roll of toilet paper. I was admonished a few times by people for having the audacity to have a roll of toilet paper rolling around visible in the back of my SUV. But there were times I might have paid twenty bucks or more for a roll.

Some bathrooms required a lot of paper towels and hand sanitizer before I was willing to touch any part of them with my hands, not to mention any other body parts. Gasoline and a match would probably be the only way to completely cleanse some of them.

You would wonder why the location would have their bathroom key attached to a large and sometimes creative item to avoid you driving off with it. Things like oil cans, Ping Pong paddles, small baseball bats, and, in one case, a brick. You have probably seen others. That brick was a good idea in case you got locked in, maybe.

Pandemic

Then, the pandemic hit. I had a supply of all the above-mentioned items, so I did not panic when I went into Publix the first time and found all the shelves cleaned off. But I suddenly found myself pumping, spraying, pouring and wiping more than ever before.

The hand sanitizer, Clorox cleaner spray bottles and paper towels started being used up and I found myself going to Publix at 7:00 AM to be first in line and I’d make a Bee line to the hand sanitizer section: EMPTY! Then to the paper products: Empty! Clorox wipes: GONE! Panic has started to set in!

I still wasn’t out of anything, you understand. But it was the mere thought of not having these life saving items that caused me to wonder how I would cope.

A friend in need is, well you know. One of these friends told me he was saving his Wall Street Journals and he would set aside half of them for me! Half! Now that is a friend!

Then, I was in one day and they have some strange looking hand sanitizer. Kills 99.9%of Bacteria it said. Limit Two. I grabbed my two and hid them in the buggy to keep anyone from reaching in and getting them when I wasn’t looking. I almost felt like a shoplifter.

In the Sanitizing wipes area, they were still out of Clorox and Lysol wipes and I saw people looking at some off-brand wipes and putting them back. One lady said, “I don’t believe they are the germ killers.”I picked up one and looked very closely. In very small print it said Kills 99.9% of most common germs. I grabbed two before anyone had a chance at them. These were mine!

I was slowly being overtaken by the sanitizer obsession!

Then the odd paper towels showed up. Bounty was out so my loyalty ended. Any paper towel was now fair game! Toilet paper in a cardboard box showed up! Buy it!

I was there yesterday. The only Bounty they had was a 12 packs and the Charmin was a 12= 48 package. Jumbo rolls So big they won’t fit on my holders. As big as a small tree trunk! So I settled for another brand of more suitable sizes.

But now, Home Depot is in the sanitizer business. They must have two or three truck loads at the store across from Publix. No limits on theirs. So, I bought some. Then I was at Lowes. They had some. So, I bought some.

Then some showed up at Publix. Limit Two. I bought one. “Don’t be greedy,” I said to myself.

Now, I am stocked up with about 10 different hand sanitizers. Now I have to decide which one I want to use. Some smell like whiskey! More stress. Now I have guilt feelings.

I have five or six brands of toilet paper. More choices. More guilt feelings. No. I am not a hoarder!

If the Clorox No Bleach spray bottles shows up, I gotta have some! I’ll even take Lysol.

And Hand wipes!? Well they better look out when they get some of those in. I may go through the line twice! Home Depot. Lowes. WalMart.

Conclusion

I may need help!

Jerome Chapman
©July 2020